In a panic of nothing to read, I turned to the category of books I own that I can read over and over again. These are basically the in between books when nothing I have is striking my fancy at the moment, but I need something…. So I turned to a much loved book , “The Year of Yes”, by Maria Dahreana Headley.
Ever read it? Her book was hysterical and a 1-2-3 read. After a lifetime of bad dating and constant weirdos hitting on her, Maria discovered she was her own worst enemy and had no judgement when it came to the people she dated. For one year, she said yes to every single person that asked her out. I won’t spoil the ending, but she takes the reader on a roller coaster ride of some just weird guys all the way down to god-awful crazies. And I’m not talking in a good way.
I think I relate to her especially because I know EXACTLY how she feels. I too am constantly bombarded with crazies, and when a at first-glance normal approaches me, it is only a matter of time for them to fall for me and then immediately lose their mind. As in drop the “I could spend my life with you” bomb or my personal favorite, “the one regret in life I have is never sleeping with you…”. Thanks. Thank you very much.
So in a fit of inspiration and the fact that my dating life has been looking pretty bleak, I thought, “maybe I should give this whole year of yes a try”. I really am too quick to judge and often regret casting people aside so hasty. I could name a name or two of people who I wish I could have had a second chance. But, *sigh*, you live & learn and can only hope that life actually teaches you a thing or two.
This whole year of yes won’t work for me. Almost immediately after I made this deal with myself, I went out for happy hour/night with some friends and friends of friends and was bombarded by a guy who basically appointed me as his “bar gf” and then “bar spooned” me the remainder of a night. Note: this is not attractive boys. Well. Unless I’m super into you, maybe, but usually it is a deal breaker. Give the girl some room to breath for god sake.
My bar bf has called me numerous times over the past few weeks to go out for dinner/drinks/whatever and I’ve been reluctant. If you can do that to a stranger, lord only know how pda–ish he’d be if we eventually dated or something. Or maybe he doesn’t get girls and because I showed a smidgen of interest, went all out. See this is how my mind works. Dating for the past ten years or so, have become jaded and don’t take it as a compliment, but more of a:
I actually talked to him this week and agreed to go out tonight, so we’ll see how it goes. I’ve decided that instead of just saying yes to everyone who asks me out (which is not going to happen in NYC, the land of the crazies), but instead just say Yes To Life and embrace all the opportunities that fly my way. For too long I think I’ve been saying, no no no, instead of taking a look of what’s really in front of me.
I’ll keep you posted. I may be singing a different tune tomorrow…