Shuffle Run Thursday

In case you haven’t noticed, I love characters dearly and am lucky enough to attract pah-lenty of them in my normal day to day life. As time goes by, I have almost become immuned to the unexpected, but certainly do not take it for granted. Oh no no. I love them all.

I work during the day in an office and it is pretty typical. Cubes and conference rooms and coffee and phones ringing and no, the phone is never for me, but for the five sales reps that sit behind me and sell ads all day. If there is the slight chance that someone is calling for me, it is either my mom, Chia, or Hen.

After hearing horror stories from my friend Nina about how terrible one of her last office jobs was, I was petrified entering the office workforce. I’m the type of person who has no problem being alone if I don’t find anyone I really click with. That may appear to be isolating and weird, which may be true. But thats me. What can you do? In present situation, I lucked out where everyone has been super welcoming and while they are all good friends, seem happy to include whoever. There isn’t really anyone who I loathe or get really angry with when I see them. And to top it off, we have a few characters in the office and that is where this blog is leading to, in case you were wondering : )

By far my favorite characters in the office include:

The Cowboy: He works in my cubicle island, has the greatest Texas accent, and wears Levi’s and cowboy boots.

Hushpuppy: Yes he wears hush puppies. I’ve seen so far white and brownish-beige ones. And he is usually decked out in the best colorful and coordinated outfits, very Stanford Blanche from Sex & The City. He’s great

Oh, you know what, there is one person that makes me cringe…and that would be”The Mystery Cougher”. He isn’t full time here at the office and usually works from home. The only reason I dislike his presence is because he coughs all day long. And it’s one of those explosive coughs thats coming from the bottom of his feet. Oh its the worst. And while on the phone, he punches his desk (I’m assuming in the heat of passion or just being so engrossed in what he’s trying to sell)! Fine fine, punch away, except, OH THAT’S RIGHT, he sits at the cube behind me and by his punching, causes my entire desk to shake. I seriously want to cry when he comes in because it just means that he will be shaking my desk for the entire day.

The best office character though is Shuffle-Runner, and yes you guessed it, he does not walk. I don’t know if he is capable of doing so, but shuffle runs all through the office. You always know where he is by the sweet sound of, how do you explain it, hmm, as if someone was rubbing a balloon on a carpet. Everytime he run along, I can’t help but wonder how many electric shocks he gets once he eventually gets back to his desk

He is the type of person who enjoys weird conversations, but is also a frantic whisperer, so you end up just laughing and saying, “oh hhhaa yeah, right, oh yeah I know I know..haha right right, ok good bye”.

Last Thursday, I was in the media room making thousands of copies when all of a sudden, who shuffles in to make copies… yeah you guessed it! Shuffle Runner! We get into a conversation about tattoos because I have some and he mumbled/whispered something about making his own.

SR: Well I have enough scars to consider them to be a tattoo

KC: Oh? Why? What does that mean?

SR: Well one time I was snorkeling in Belize…

KC: (I’m assuming here is when I formed a “oooo lucky, why haven’t I gone snorkeling in Belize face/pout)

SR:….when out of nowhere a boat pulled up to where we were snorkeling…

SR: ….and they dumped some garbage on me….

KC: (WHAT!!!!)

SR: And then a shark came and mistook me for garbage and bit me.

KC: WHAT THE HELL (while dropping all thousand papers onto the floor). How are you still standing here!! How did you get the shark away??

SR: Welll everyone I was swimming with left me because they didn’t want to get bit too.

KC: ARE YOU KIDDING ME!

So he continued about two more minutes of this story, which included details such as “two hundred stitches” and “ripping through my shoulder like butter”, and I had enough and sprinted to my desk to tell anyone I was chatting with mid-day about this random story.

Unanswered questions:

a) How did he survive? I mean how do you get away from a shark? That just mind-boggles me.

b) How do you stay friends with people when they leave you in the mercy of a shark?

c) How does getting bit by a shark have anything to do with getting tattoos?

d) How did I not hear this story SOONER!
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